gonna probably be arrested for parole violation in about twenty minutes nbd so if I’m off the internet for a few days this is why Gray please feed my saber-tooth and don’t laugh at me I’m serious its the little things that cheer people up, okay?
I’ll call Aidan about this.
This is horseshit.
God luc. Ruth and Cal says theyr on it and shuld fix it son.
He can be kind of an instigator. Ruth is sending you some apology wine.
In other news SWORD
I HAVE A SWORD. EVERYTHING IS APPROXIMATELY A THOUSAND TIMES BETTER. Honey, what is so………………………… what?
WHAT
AIDAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH…
Wait, what? I was pretty sure that girl was gay.
No, I was the gay one in that relationship, thank you. Though initially I wasn’t aware of my feelings. It’s a long story that I’m sure Willie would be happy to tell you at some point. Or maybe Liffre.
The point is, she’s not gay.
She has liasons with women at other people’s weddings and then never calls even though she swears she’s going to call. Also, how old is she? Because I am twenty-six years older than Felix and either she’s exactly exactly forty-one or something sketchy is happening with people’s life choices. Mostly hers, but also I don’t really want to be one degree of separation away from my own asshole nephew. This is why I shouldn’t drink at weddings.
Well, I’m sure she does.
Yes, she should be around that age. Maybe a bit younger.
Maria- what would you see in him if you were a scared, pathetic woman who thought that having affairs with demons who were literally eating your fiance’s brain was a good idea? Felix is really just an attractive version of a brain eating demon
I might need a shower now.
He can be kind of an instigator. Ruth is sending you some apology wine.
In other news SWORD
I HAVE A SWORD. EVERYTHING IS APPROXIMATELY A THOUSAND TIMES BETTER. Honey, what is so………………………… what?
WHAT
AIDAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH…
Wait, what? I was pretty sure that girl was gay.
No, I was the gay one in that relationship, thank you. Though initially I wasn’t aware of my feelings. It’s a long story that I’m sure Willie would be happy to tell you at some point. Or maybe Liffre.
The point is, she’s not gay.
She has liasons with women at other people’s weddings and then never calls even though she swears she’s going to call. Also, how old is she? Because I am twenty-six years older than Felix and either she’s exactly exactly forty-one or something sketchy is happening with people’s life choices. Mostly hers, but also I don’t really want to be one degree of separation away from my own asshole nephew. This is why I shouldn’t drink at weddings.
He can be kind of an instigator. Ruth is sending you some apology wine.
In other news SWORD
I HAVE A SWORD. EVERYTHING IS APPROXIMATELY A THOUSAND TIMES BETTER. Honey, what is so………………………… what?
WHAT
AIDAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH…
Wait, what? I was pretty sure that girl was gay.
Ruthie! Maria and Colin showed me how to use this Internet thing. I’m sending you an e-mail on the internet. No, I am informed that this is a tumbler but not the interesting kind for drinking. Message in a bottle? At any rate. Rita and Arthur and I arrived safely and relatively unbothered by…
none of us is pretty have a nice weekend
Cal, stop trolling Maria’s neighbors, please.
what is trolling? like trawling but without a boat?
He’s only teasing you.
why?
Nick, let it go. That man is a flaming queer and we don’t have to listen to him.
i thought thats what we were now
No, we have class.
First of all, my wife is slandering me. I am not teasing you. I just think one of you is particularly pretty, as people go. I didn’t mean for it to turn into an elaborate Internet debate in which things are poorly spelled. Second off, you still haven’t told me what trawling is other than it involves a boat. Third off, would you like to see a literal flaming queer because (redacted)
Note From Those Of Us Whose Blog It Actually Is: No. Just no.
BUT WE’RE LETTING HIM PLAY WITH THE TUMBLR BECAUSE HE BROUGHT ME A SWORD. I HAVE A SWORD AGAIN. A SWORD. AND A KNIFE. THEIR NAMES ARE KRIS AND MINNA AND MY LIFE IS COMPLETE AGAIN. AND THEY BROUGHT COLIN A STAVE AND A PRETTY BOSS DAGGER AND WE”RE ALLOWED TO KEEP THIS BECAUSE ATLANTIS WILL FUCK FELIX’S SHIT UP IF HE FEELS THE NEED TO BE A PETTY BITCH ABOUT THIS.
But Cal is still not allowed to set himself on mystical fire and parade around the apartment building making flaming queer jokes. Nope. Even though my stave is pretty badass.
NICK MY KNIFE IS STILL THE BEST KNIFE. THANKS. BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU I HAVE THE BEST KNIFE AND A GODDAMN SWORD NOW. MY LIFE IS BETTER. I AM HAPPY. I LOVE MY FRIENDS. CAL, STOP TEASING NICK.
Slander. I am not teasing.
this is trawling http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trawling which one of us is pretty? YAY MARIA SWORDS AND COLIN STAFS YAY
Congratulations, you two.
Cal its Nadia Ruth says she cant beleve she has to tel you not to set your selv on fir but you cant set your selv on fir your not alowed and to stop trawling or youl not get anything wen you get hom.
Nadia (but Ruth said)
And yay for Maria happy wepons.
Ruthie! Maria and Colin showed me how to use this Internet thing. I’m sending you an e-mail on the internet. No, I am informed that this is a tumbler but not the interesting kind for drinking. Message in a bottle? At any rate. Rita and Arthur and I arrived safely and relatively unbothered by…
none of us is pretty have a nice weekend
Cal, stop trolling Maria’s neighbors, please.
what is trolling? like trawling but without a boat?
He’s only teasing you.
Ruthie! Maria and Colin showed me how to use this Internet thing. I’m sending you an e-mail on the internet. No, I am informed that this is a tumbler but not the interesting kind for drinking. Message in a bottle? At any rate. Rita and Arthur and I arrived safely and relatively unbothered by…
none of us is pretty have a nice weekend
Cal, stop trolling Maria’s neighbors, please.
I obviously stopped her from deleting the Tumblr and also the Neopets account, if you care. She’s asleep now. We’re all good.
I really think Maria should be seeing a counselor and not, you know, playing Neopets.
I’m glad you have a blog, Maria, but…
Just, you know, people who have been put out of their jobs by the new Ministry. Why not try talking to other former rebel mages? You could form a support group.
Macaroni art is better than NeoPets because it helps you express yourself. You made a mess with the oil paints and were disaster with the glass so…
Willie, you told them to make art with broken glass. When did that look like a good idea? Besides, it keeps her busy and amused. Most of the rebel mages moved to Atlantis and the displaced nonmages are not interested in being friends with us, I promise you. One of them mailed us a dead cat.
I happen to like my fucking saber-tooth tigers and Meerca chase. Right Gray? Meerca chase and the one with the explosions. The one with the color explosions is fucking nifty, am I right?
Absolute best. Ignore Willie and her talk of therapy. All that’s good for is making you stupid and jittery.
you saved the world you dont need anybody to tell you about your feelings
THANK YOU NICK. You are the best. You are just the best. Do you guys want a like promise-ring present? Like a crock pot or something? Since you’re not getting married but this seems like an appropriately equivalent time to get you housewares. I’d get you a gun, but I can’t.
dont care bout presents yes i want you to be a dog i miss having dos aroound there were dogs in my hometown lets go the park that sounds fun
Okay. Park tomorrow then? Gray can feed the Neopets while we’re out, since he cares so much. Gray, do you all need any housewares? After the park, can you help us put our shelves together?
I think a good oven mitt and a pan or two would be in place, but don’t go out of your way.
yes of course id love to shelves are fun
Guys can I make you an oven mit? Theyr fun to make with the lops and they work jus as good for taking things out ovens as the stor ones do and you can make em prety in colors.
It’s Colin. Maria’s at work right now. If you need any help figuring out the Internet, let me know, or Mr. Gray. You remember Mr. Gray, don’t you?
Guys, Nadia’s at sisterandihaveablog.tumblr.com
Nadia, I would be more than happy to assist…
we are not lesbians what are you taking about we aint women. and were not getting married thats for people who can have children. god doesnt see it as a marriage anyway
First off, thank you, you two. It’s very kind of you. We’re not formally getting married, but we are working to a similar goal. I understand English isn’t your first langauge, so it’s fine, Nadia.
I had confuse becus in Trelian nuns had gendar and Ruth says Englis nuns dont have gendar but the words for gaylesban do and som other words do which makes confuse. Sorry. Congratlations on your allmost maried.
nuns have gendr ruth doesnt know what shes talking about. nuns are female always. and they have to be born female they cant be that fancy kind of female but acutally female. nuns are wonderful women and ruth is confused
ruth are you jewish? do jewish people have nuns? i cant think ofa single religeon that doesnt have nuns why did you tell her nuns didnt have gender?
Jesus Christ. Nouns, Nick. In her language, nouns had gender. Like in Spanish. Nouns. She can’t spell. Nouns. You know Spanish don’t you? You know about noun gender?
